#1 Success And Happiness Don’t Come From Things.
I know this one might sound obvious. We hear people say it all the time, and we see it on motivational posters. But I know that for many of us, it’s ingrained in our minds that we need to have a specific quality of life or achieve a certain standard in order to be happy. Those things are taught to us from a very young age. We learn to tie those types of achievements to our self-worth. We come to associate worthy with status.
I come from a very small, Southern, presentable, “pillars-of-the-community” type of family. I grew up knowing there were certain expectations of me. Expectations of behavior, of the way we dressed and presented ourselves, and of our achievements to be successful.
My mom was a workaholic. (In many ways, she still is.) She’s one of those people who can’t sit still– she always needs to be doing something, and she isn’t too big on the idea of self-care. So I’ve just always had this drive and ambition and an expectation for myself that I had to achieve a certain standard of living.
One day, I was really depressed. I was feeling anxious and totally defeated. I was working way more hours than any human should work in a very intensive job. Plus I was a single mom at the time with a two-year-old and a four-year-old.
And I remember sitting on the floor in my room and just looking around at my stuff, and just asking myself “Why?” like “What am I killing myself for? Why are these things so important?”
I had this perception bubble burst and suddenly, nothing made sense. The things I was valuing and the things I was associating with my self-worth just didn’t make sense anymore.
And that was really the beginning of my journey– it wasn’t the end, like some huge revelation and then everything changed. It was a difficult thought process for me to break, but that was the very beginning of it.
#2 If I Don’t Need The Person, I Don’t Need Their Things.
I remember this being a revelation for me right after college. I used to be somebody who had a really hard time letting go of things from people. I remember looking through memorabilia from past boyfriends or friends and feeling really bad and depressed. I remember thinking, “Why am I holding onto these things if I decided I don’t need these people in my life anymore?”
From that moment on, I became ruthless with those types of items. Any belongings that made me feel bad about a certain situation, I would just let it go. I realized that I was just torturing myself by holding onto things that didn’t provide any kind of value to my life.
#3 Less Is More Except For When It’s Less
This was a revelation that came to me much later in the process when I was already starting to practice and even share about minimalism. This isn’t something that you’re going to hear a minimalist share very often, but I definitely found that to be the case.
I’ve seen that happen to people over and over again when they decide that they want to live a minimalist life. They want to let things go. In the process of trying to find that balance, they overdo it and let go of too much stuff.
I remember there was one point where I’d got rid of most of the living room furniture and replaced it with beanbags. I was like, “We don’t even need furniture! We can just use bean bags!” And not only did it not look great, but it ended up taking up just as much space. I cringe when I look at the pictures of how our living room looked during that period of time. 😂
I just started going overboard and kind of obsessing about the stuff, even the stuff that really wasn’t necessarily cluttered. I think that this over-obsession happens to a lot of people when they start to try to practice minimalism. When you stick to the rule of “less is more,” well, that can be a little bit too simplistic, right? Less is not always more. Sometimes you do need things to functionally support you in your daily flow.
That’s really why I share about holistic clutter-free spaces, not just minimalist spaces, because first of all, I don’t think that minimalist aesthetics works for everybody. It’s not as supportive to a lot of people and the way that they like to experience their environments. But also, the holistic side of things means that you need to have the things that are going to be supportive to you in your daily functions and the things that bring happiness.
Maybe that’s a piece of art on the wall that’s not functionally purposeful, but it does serve the function of bringing you happiness and just making you smile when you look at it. Well, I think that that’s just as valid as anything else. It took me a lot of cringy situations to come to the final conclusion that less is more, except when it’s less.
#4 Clutter Is A Mental Battle, Not A Physical One.
Unless you’re moving really heavy things like heavy furniture, our belongings aren’t really offering us much resistance. That resistance is coming from us, our mental attachments to things, our habits, our shopping tendencies, how we relate to our space, the things that we do, and the things that we don’t do.
Usually, when I’m helping other people to create a clutter-free space, it’s not an issue of needing the right physical space. It’s almost always an issue of learning how to let go. They need to learn how to be okay with parting with things that they really don’t need.
#5 Less Stuff = Less Cleaning.
The last of my minimalism revelations is short and sweet, but it’s something that I appreciate every day. If you’re somebody who liked me, who does not relish cleaning and constantly working inside of your home, having less stuff is the easiest way to get there. Case closed.
Those are my top five aha moments when practicing minimalism and clutter-free living. I had these minimalism revelations at different stages of my journey, and I’m sure I’ll have more to come.
Other Minimalism Revelations!
I thought I could end by sharing what other people had to say. Here are some more minimalism revelations or “aha” moments that you all shared!
- It’s not useful if I’m not using it.
- Organizers are a trap!
- Hidden clutter is still clutter (looking at you, junk drawers)
- It doesn’t have to take up space to be clutter.
- All of this stuff used to be money.
- Would I buy this again?
- Less clutter = less on my mind. A clear mind is a happy me.
I loved these submissions, so thanks to those who shared! I can’t wait to hear what other aha moments/ minimalism revelations the rest of you had– remember, we’ve all been there.
